A similar thing happened to me when I was 13. An open table that you could sign into and join, everyone else was an adult. Right away there was a battle in a graveyard. On my first turn when I moved, the DM said that because I didn’t make a spot check before moving I didn’t see the open grave and ran right into it. I fell in and took ridiculous damage. Then on my next turn, I tried to climb out and because I was a halfling they said it was impossible for me to climb out of the Nice All dads are created equal but only the finest raise Machinists vintage shirt open grave. So another turn in the hole. Turn comes back around and I try to use my daggers to climb out. They ruled that my dagger broke and I fell back into the hole onto my second dagger and the damage knocked me out.
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After the encounter ended and I eventually regained consciousness, the rest of the party refused to help me out of the grave unless I admitted I was the stupidest adventurer of all time. It was a table of 30-40-year-old men acting this way. One of them was one of the people who worked on Baldur’s Gate. Any time I protested I was told that I just had to know the game better and be a better player. I was always told it was my fault and if I didn’t like it then I should be Nice All dads are created equal but only the finest raise Machinists vintage shirt a better player. So all throughout elementary school and junior high I read every book over and over and over. I memorized every damn detail of everything in 3.5, I min-maxed every character as best as possible, I took notes on how other players handled things that were deemed the correct way to handle it.
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But guess what. I would respond to a challenge the way they previously said is the correct way to respond (when someone else did it), I would roll insanely high with every possible 3.5 min/max benefit, and still, be told I not only failed but basically critical failed. Most of my playing experience from 5-18 played out that way. This last decade I’ve almost exclusively been a DM, half the time with veteran players and half the Nice All dads are created equal but only the finest raise Machinists vintage shirt time with rookies. But I take pride in the fact that everyone I DM for has fun, everyone I DM for feels like they did a good job, everyone I DM for feels like they’re wanted at the table. And it disgusts me that this isn’t the standard for all DMs. It’s one thing that so many older players shit on me but that no DM ever wrangled it in, and in fact, they piled on the most is just way beyond acceptable behavior to me.
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